Published by: Ashlee Nix ~ Volume 6, Issue 7~ April 2012
Reminders/Announcements/Polls
results of last month's polls:
pizza hut.
MUSIC SPOTLIGHT
Lions and Dragons by Zach Williams. Guaranteed you've never heard that one.
Pickings of the Brain
(otherwise known as random thoughts)
resurrecting an old fav, never honk at old people
c'mon june! ready for summer break.
*40 WAYS TO MAKE THE PIZZA GUY NERVOUS*
7. Answer his questions with other questions.
8. Spell the ingredients.
*RANDOM FACTS*
About 10,000 average size cells would fit on the head of a pin
Spot, Data's cat on Star Trek: he Next Generation, was played by six different cats
More people are killed each year from bees than snakes.
*DEEP THOUGHTS*
What disease did cured ham actually have?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
**JOKE OF THE MONTH **
Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, '
Why is the bride dressed in white?
' Because white is the color of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life.'
The child thought about this for a moment then said, 'So why is the groom wearing black?
*PEOPLE OF WALMART*
Even though we love bacon in our breakfast, it looks like bacon is turning up everywhere – places you'd never expect bacon to be. Here's a list of 10 + 1 of some of the weirdest bacon products around. Enjoy!
1. Bacon Mints
2. Bacon Jam
3. Bacon Gum
4. Bacon Ice Cream
5. Bacon Chocolate Bar
6. Bacon Gummies
7. Bacon Vodka
8. Bacon Lollipops
9. Bacon Mayonnaise
10. Bacon Salt
11. Bacon Bits
What's the weirdest bacon product you've come across? Would you try any of these?
Food for Thought
A Circuit Overseer was visiting a congregation recently and had this interesting experience to relate. He said; "I've heard a number of the friends say about rap music: Oh, I don't listen to those nasty words. I just like the beat.. In fact, I don't even KNOW any of the words."
He then asked the audience: "Are YOU one of those people? If so, let me tell you about an experience I heard recently."Here's what he told the congregation:
There was a young scientist who did an experiment with rats. He taught all of them to go through a maze. After a while he decided to time them to see how long it would take the rats to get through, and, on average, he found that it took approximately ten minutes. He then decided to separate the rats into three groups and experiment with them for two weeks.The first group would act as the control group and so he did absolutely nothing to change their routine.
For the second group, he put a speaker on top of the cage and for about ten hours a day, he played classical music.For the third group, he also put a speaker on top of the cage, but exposed them to rap music for ten hours a day. After the two week testing period, he examined the first group of rats and, again, had them go through the maze.. As always, it took them just about ten minutes to go through. The second group, the ones exposed to classical music, went through the maze, but it only took them eight minutes. Hmmm. They shaved off two minutes. Interesting.
Finally, he went to the third group of rats. The ones exposed to rap music.
"How long do you think it took THEM to go through the maze? Would you believe that it took that third group of rats TWENTY MINUTES where originally, it had only taken them ten minutes. Apparently, the rap music slowed them down mentally - and the rats didn't know the words either! Do you know why they slowed down so much?"The audience sat quietly and listened. And the Circuit Overseer explained: "We don't know. And the young scientist doesn't know either because he was unable to continue the experiment. He was forced to stop. Why? All the rats that had been exposed to the rap music for ten hours a day for two weeks all started to kill each other!" {A soft, collective gasp from the audience.}The Circuit Overseer concluded his talk with a thought provoking statement: "Friends, consider carefully. Do you really think that such vulgar, crude, and profane rap music has no effect on you?" And really, it doesn't matter if we're talking about music, TV, books, bad associations, or anything else that is vulgar, profane, or crude from Jehovah's point of view. Don't fool yourself into thinking that it has no effect on you!"
From Contributing Writers
PHOTOBOMB!
MLIA/MLIG/MLS/IMMD
The other day my class asked our latin teacher what makes him the teacher and us the students. He responded with "Well you see kids...my chair spins and your's does not." I have never had so much faith in our education system. MLIA
Today, I walked into the bathroom only to find my 12 year old brother and his friend attempting to shave their legs. Never have I felt so awkward. MLIA.
This week was spirit week at my school. For junior spirit day, half our grade dressed in all red, the other half in all black. We then played a giant game of checkers throughout the day by leapfrogging over each other in the hallways. MLIA
Today I was in a car with three other guys when Love Story by Taylor Swift came on. The driver asked if any of us wanted to keep listening, or if he should change the channel. There was a brief moment of silence, then one of the guys said "No, you know I kind of like this song.." Everyone else quickly confessed that they did too. I'm glad I'm not alone. MLIA.
Today, I was pulled over for speeding. I tried flirting with the officer to get him to lower my ticket. If I was a girl, I think this would have worked much better. MLIA
Today, I was walking my dog when he tripped and stumbled. I laughed at him and thought about how humans are so much smarter than dogs. I then tripped over the exact same object. I now feel truly humble. MLIA
Today, my iPod went silent for a few seconds, I looked up and I was walking past a memorial service. It's nice to know my iPod is respectful. MLIA
Today I was on a long train ride. To kill some time I decided to chat to the guy next to me. I said, "How now hath thy day been?" He turned around, held my hands and answered, "My Lady, 'tis been nothing but canker-blossomed train rides." That was the best response I've ever gotten for that question. MLIA
Yesterday, I learned that my friend's initials spell RAWR. Not only am I convinced that he's secretly a dinosaur, but I have never been more jealous in my life. MLIA.
Today, when my parents got home from Wal-Mart, they gave my sister the Hannah Montana CD she'd been begging for. I got a pound of Swedish fish, a dinosaur keychain and a plastic sword. They've made it very obvious who the favorite child is. MLIA
Poetry for the Month of April
Poem
A way for expressing thoughts
that you don’t know how to explain.
Conveying feelings and words
that tell of happiness or pain.
A painting that’s not on canvas,
a sculpture that has no form,
a song composed without a tune,
when you are feeling forlorn.
It may be understood by many,
it may be understood by few.
Writing about feelings you had in the past,
or feelings that are brand new.
Poems reveal your innermost person,
the true depth of your soul,
allowing people to see the real you,
to see your person as a whole.
A way to relieve your sorrow,
a way to share your joy,
a way to tell a story
that other people can enjoy.
Every poem is unique,
not one is like the next.
Every poem is a tale with hidden meaning,
and you never know what to expect.
© Ashlee Nix 2006
Quotes of the Month
Follow your heart, but take your brain with you.
Love isn't blind; it just only sees what matters.
you cant make something seem there when its not. but , you can put something there when there isnt.
When you come to the end of your rope…
Tie a knot and hang on.
Franklin D. Roosevelt
"A lie manages to get half way around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on" Winston Churchill
I think one of the universal truths about humanity is that despite conclusive evidence to the contrary, we always think there’s going to be more time. This is why we have planners and cell phones and P.D.A.s and computer reminders and good old pen and paper to tell us when to do what at what time, and yet time seems to be getting shorter as we get more things to “manage” it.
I guess we are who we are for a lot of reasons. And maybe we’ll never know most of them. But even if we don’t have the power to choose where we come from, we can still choose where we go from there.
-The perks of Being a Wallflower
All I’m gonna do is just go on and do what I feel
- Jimi Hendrix
“Faith is not simply a patience that passively suffers until the storm is past. Rather, it is a spirit that bears things - with resignations, yes, but above all, with blazing, serene hope.”
-Corazon Aquino
"If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be.
Now put the foundations under them."
-Henry David Thoreau
This site (MRotPI) is a compilation of my own thoughts and others, and may use quotes, pictures, jokes, and news items from various sources. i do not claim credit for any of the pictures, quotes, or other items on this page that are not of my own design, and no copyright infringement is intended